May 2, 2005
Bravo, Rosie!
Rosie O'Donnell accomplished something yesterday. Her portrayal of a mentally retarded woman resulted in me not being able to watch a movie. She did something that Steven Seagal, Troll 2, and Sylvester Stallone couldn't. She made me so sick that I could not watch even five minutes of Riding The Bus With My Sister.
I tip my hat to you, Rosie. Your annoying persona was magnified ten fold while you pretended to be a retarded woman. I now have no faith in my bad movie watching skills.
Larry, if you would like to write a guest BMM review, go for it. I'm going to go cry in the dark.
Posted by Matt Niemi at May 2, 2005 1:17 PMI wish i could write this review but words would not do justice to the performance of Fat Rosie... brilliant, genius, impeccable, superb, no these words just won't do, in fact there is no word or words in the english language to describe the mastery of her craft. Unfortunately though i could only suffer through about fifteen minutes of it. The story was nowhere near as compelling as "Spring Break Shark Attack" and i must admit i missed "Locusts" but i have the sneaky suspicion Mike Farrell might of given Fat Rosie a run for her money as far as acting chops.
Alas after fifteen minutes i didn't know whether i wanted to take a lethal dose of lsd or gouge my eyes out with a fork... either way i made sure to call my sister and tell her that i liked her and we needed to ride the bus together, and that my friends is inspiring.
Just one last note... her portrayal of the mentally disabled made me believe that at times Fat Rosie makes her lesbian lover change her soiled diaper. There's no doubt in my mind that she crapped her pants during the making of that film in order to enhance her understanding of the character. What sacrifice for her art! Viva Fat Rosie.
Posted by: larry at May 2, 2005 1:50 PMi can't stop, sign me up for the rosie fan club, the more i hear the better i gets, though howard stern had a great point-- if she's supposed to be retarded why does she sound deaf? Heard tape of the scene where Fat Rosie's dad is dying and almost wrecked into a telephone poll, you can really feel the pain man, mindblowingly dramatic tv cinema, i mean she's almost as good as that kid on "Life Goes On", anyway i hope people heard Howard Stern cut up the tape of the film and call hardware stores with Fat Rosie yelling about toilet seats, it was priceless.
Posted by: Larry at May 3, 2005 9:15 AMIt would be a shame if she won an emmy for that. I watched about fifteen minutes of that movie and I coudn't tell the difference between retard Rosie and the annoying talk show host Rosie. By the way Larry, the Stern staff did cut that tape up and call a hardware store.
Posted by: Josh at May 3, 2005 4:40 PMDear Josh, that fact you can't tell the difference between the Fat Retard Rosie and annoying talk show Rosie is exactly why she should win the emmy. Where does art stop and reality begin? When a performance is so mortifyingly surrealistic how do you remove your eyes from the trainwreck? Great art is always misunderstood. Bravo Fat Rosie, bravo!!
Posted by: Larry at May 4, 2005 10:16 AMFat retarded lesbian talk show host friend of Madonna lesbian fat pin cushion lesbian fat spastic dyke lesbian pope talk show host lesbian backward half-witted bovine Rosie.
Posted by: Jamie at May 4, 2005 1:05 PMAfter Sean Penn was acting like a 'tard in 'I'm Sam', it struck me that actors seem to get easy accolades by pretending to be Joeys. A talent that any normal person hones to perfection in the playground. I came upon the idea of the ultimate Oscar worthy script. It was all to do with a bunch of retarded poverty line African American's running their own burger joint. 'Whoppers and Goobers'. The ultimate actor getting credence for acting the spaz would be Michael J Fox. He would be the token white guy, sort of resuming his bewilderment in the face of chaos thing from Back to the Future, as 'Vanilla Shake'. Also Richard Pryor would play 'Chief' - the man afraid of everything. And Forest Whitaker (who looks retarded with 'that' eye) as 'Dr. Feelnuttin'.
It would pan out something like this?
INT: Burger bar. DR FEELNUTTIN is working the fryer.
CHIEF: Errr, I don't know about that brother workin'
on the fries. The muthefucka don't got no nerve
endings.
FATSHIT: He ain't right! I told you...
VANILLA SHAKE: Aw c'mon boss. He's ahh, been workin
real hard. That's kinda, ahh, what he wants to err...
DR. FEELNUTTIN drops his cigar into the boiling fryer
and delves his hand in to retrieve it.
CHIEF: Oh god! Motha of all fuck!
FATSHIT: He ain't right! I told you...
CHIEF is hysterical, bordering on inconsolable.
CHIEF: Get yo godmamned no feelin' hand outta you
crazy ass piece o' crap!
VANILLA SHAKE (running around): Oh god, uhh, Chief,
ahh. I don't know if that's the best way to approach
this?
CHIEF: I ain't approaching shit you cracker ass freak!
That nigga's fryin his own damn hand!
FATSHIT: He ain't right! I told you...
Etc.