Who Will Be the Next Pope?

So it looks as if Pope John Paul II will be passing away soon. I'm not exactly sure how the next Pope will be selected. I think a bunch of Cardinals get together and vote. BORING! They need to spice this thing up. In the age of reality TV here are some of my suggestions:

Three words Steel...Cage...Deathmatch: Two men enter one Pope leaves.

Vatican Idol: Papal candidates sing hymns and come up with clever raps about the evils of birth control. Pat Boone hosts.

Duck, Duck, Pope!: A rousing game of "Duck, Duck, Goose" with slight rule changes will undoubtly settle this problem.

The Vatican's Next Top Model: The candidates will participate in a series of modeling activities. The sexiest and most handsome man gets to wear the giant hat.

Pimp My Pope-mobile: Various Cardinals design new Pope-mobiles. The coolest ride will find himself living in Vatican City.

The Hunt for Sinead O'Connor: A deserted island, ten heavily armed Cardinals vying for Pope, and Sinead O'Connor. The hunt is on. Whoever kills Sinead gets the position.

Any more suggestions?