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January 14, 2005

New Jersey Sucks

...and the New Jersey Association of Real Vampires (NJARV) proves my point.

From the Frequently Asked Questions section:

What is a real vampire, anything like Hollywood?
This is a touchy question because the definition isn't exactly agreed upon. For this website, a real vampire is anyone who claims to be a real vampire. If you are, think, or pretend is your business and you will probably get something out of this website either way.
Posted by Matt Niemi at January 14, 2005 3:13 PM
Comments

What about Vampiyaz? Any websites for those?

Posted by: Burns at January 14, 2005 4:31 PM

Didn't you mean the governor sucks???

Posted by: TEDD at January 17, 2005 2:54 PM

its not the governor, its the restrictor plate.i took it off to give the red dragon a lil extra juice. lets keep it on the down low, shes not exactly street legal...

Posted by: frank the tank at January 17, 2005 6:24 PM

Hi my names Larry and i'm a real vampire. I'm in a vampire club where we talk about vampires and the properties of vampires. We drink lots of cherry kool-aid and wear cool plastic teeth with fangs. I talk in a ridiculous transylvanian accent and wear black on the outside cuz black is how i feel on the inside. (and not because of the cherry kool-aid, vampiyaz drink grape kool-aid) I also have a rubber black bat with scary fangs, his name is nosferatu and he does my bidding. Beware when the moon is full and thriller plays on the jukebox and vincent price is doing voice-overs and kiefer sutherland shows up in tattered clothes, riding a cool motorbike. Maggots michael you're eating maggots.

Posted by: larry at January 18, 2005 12:29 PM

Come visit, I'll show you the state bird.

Posted by: JERSEY BIRD at November 7, 2005 11:15 PM